Caught in the self improvement circus!

When you're both a seeker and a creative soul, it’s easy  to find yourself caught in what I call the "self-improvement circus.” It's similar to being on a hamster wheel; once you're in, it's hard to get off.

This is what it looks like!

We read one self-help book after the other, ‘How to be a leader’ etc. We book the next retreat on ‘Calming the mind’, while another course on ‘How to be a better artist’ is already awaiting us, a few weeks down the line. The self improvement circus never stops, there’s always more work to be done to become a better version of ourselves.

Often we don’t realise, that this is a form of hiding, instead of just showing up as our imperfect selves with our work, which is also in a constant process of growing and changing.

Basically we are telling ourselves:

‘I am not ready yet. I first still have to find out what’s wrong with me and fix it.’

A few people have told me, that they go into the paralysis analysis universe with no exit to be found. Being caught up in the rumination loop of what next course they need to take to become a better person and to finally be good enough.

Believe me, I know this one too well myself.

The longer we are stuck in this hamster wheel, the harder it gets to stop and to find the next best step. To get back into action! To finally show up with what we’ve got to offer.

Maybe because our ‘I am not good enough’ part takes over the stirring wheel, the whole thing becomes nearly addictive. Always looking for the next course, or book which will finally do the trick, but it never does. While our inner dissatisfaction and frustration grows slowly but steadily.

Why? Because we secretly really wanted to matter in this world, make an impact, be finally seen and heard with what we’ve got to share and say.

Personally I for sure fell pray to the self improvement circus and I don’t wanna know how much money went down the drains… Don’t get me wrong I also visited some great courses, that were really helpful, but still.

Breaking free from this cycle is no easy feat. It requires challenging the belief that there's something inherently wrong with us, that we must fix ourselves before we can fully participate in the world. Authentic visibility, I believe, is about having the courage to show up as our imperfect selves, quirks included.

The more quirky, the better, that’s in my mind at least.

I want to make clear, that self improvement as such can be a wonderful tool, when we use it wisely and with discernment. But we need to look at our motivation, that’s driving it.

Is our pursuit of growth driven by genuine curiosity and a desire for personal insight, or are we simply perpetuating a narrative of never being enough? Are we finding the right people and approaches?

It’s a balancing act, trying to find out what’s really helping us to make a significant change in our lives. Or what’s rather keeping us stuck in a very unhealthy pattern. It means seeking out genuine support systems that encourage us to embrace our uniqueness, rather than conforming to someone else's standards, or system.

It’s really important we find a way to show up in this world, that feels good to us and is in sink with who we are as a person. Even though it might be uncomfortable and a bit scary at the same time…

In the end, authentic visibility requires us to show up as we are, right here, right now. It's about finding the courage to embrace our imperfections and share our authentic selves with the world.

Independent of whether we feel ready or not, we show up, we take the risk!

Let me conclude with the following question:

‘Have you ever found yourself caught in the self-improvement circus? What were the consequences for you?’

I'd love to hear your thoughts.